December 23, 2011

Happy Fucking Holidays

The DOJ has rejected a Freedom of Information Act request from the New York Times that asked the agency to reveal the legal basis for the newly unveiled American program of strategic drone-attack assassinations of American citizens off the field of battle.
Summary:

* The government dropped a bomb on a U.S. citizen,

* who, though a total dick and probably a criminal, may have been engaged only in propaganda,

* which, though despicable, is generally protected by the First Amendment;

* it did so without a trial or even an indictment (that we know of),

* based at least in part on evidence it says it has but won't show anyone,

* and on a legal argument it has apparently made but won't show anyone,

* and the very existence of which it will not confirm or deny;

* although don't worry, because the C.I.A. would never kill an American without having somebody do a memo first;

* and this is the "most transparent administration ever";

* currently run by a Nobel Peace Prize winner.
I'm a bit confused about the calendar. Was 1932 three years ago, or is it next year? Or maybe I'm thinking of 1934.

Well, it doesn't matter. Anyway, you don't care. No, you actually don't. How do I know that? Because in numerous ways, you still support this system. How do you support it? Ah, something to consider over the holidays. I could provide lots of links to previous articles here to help you out, but ... eh. You don't follow them when I do. Phooey to that.

Besides, I'm very sick right now. My major concern is trying to avoid having to call 911. For the third time. I don't want to do that. Three strikes and you're out, and all that. Hey, maybe I'll have a fatal heart attack on Christmas Day! That would be, like, totally cool, man. I could still hang out with you -- as an angel. Seriously, dude! Seventy-seven percent of adult Americans think angels are real! Seventy. Seven. Percent.

I guess this is what it feels like to wake up and find that you're trapped in an asylum for the incurably insane, where the administrators arbitrarily kill inmates now and then, just to pass the time.

So Happy Holidays to me! And to you, natch, and to the angel hovering over there. Look out, that angel's gonna launch another drone! Hahahaha.

God bless us, every fucking one.